Reviews by:
@the_owlseyes
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I don't want to write an introduction to this sh!£45t.
“I’m so smart now. Everyone’s always like ‘take your top off.’ Sorry, NO! They always want to get that money shot. I’m not stupid”
Paris Hilton
“The most loving thing to do is to share your bed with someone”
Michael Jackson
“There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again”
George W. Bush
“I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don’t know into what religion yet"
David Beckham
“I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman”
Arnold Schwarzenegger
“Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it’s tuna but it says chicken of the sea”
Jessica Simpson
“I’ve got taste. It’s inbred in me”
David Hasselhoff
“So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?”
Christina Aguilera
“I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that’s very popular out there in Africa”
Britney Spears
“You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass”
Donald Trump
“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost an important part of your life”
Brooke Shields
PLOT
"Dom and the crew must take on an international terrorist who turns out to be Dom and Mia's estranged brother" or "Same sh!t as the previous ones".
SCRIPT
I'll try putting it down in a way which doesn't seem offensive or else. This movie has no script. Every character is a blur. The villain is forgettable and weak. The plot is thin like a paper sheet. There's also the fact that most of the thing on display here doesn't make sense and physics is non existent.
This movie starts in a way which seems interesting but after a while it's clear that it's just a bait. Characters who care more about wrecking the world than their kid, a lack of tension and dialogues which seem written by a 5 years old kid. The movie seems self aware of its dumbness, and there's a character who function as a audience proxy. None of the characters seems killable, which is the reason why it's hard to identify with them. Death is a joke here because we have a popular character coming back from the dead with a stupid explanation. A motivation which makes some installments non sensical.
Sure, this movie is pure entertaining but it doesn't justify the fact that it lacks every aspect necessary to a script.
I'm not disappointed but I'm sicken by the fact that a scipt like that has made the final cut.
Script: 4/10
ACTING
I'm not saying that it's the worst thing I've ever seen but surely it isn't good. It's strange because Charlize Theron and Helen Mirren are part of the cast. Maybe it's because mediocre or bad actors have more screen time. Vin Diesel has just two expressions and his acting goes to the dogs. The only one amongst them who does a better job is John Cena but I wanted to see more of him. Also, I don't buy him as a villain. There're cameos of actors who have been part of the franchise but their roles are sidelined. Overall, if it wasn't for John Cena, Charlize Theron and Helen Mirren, this would've been worst.
Acting: 5/10
PHOTOGRAPHY
As the editing, it's just there to make this movie seem competent, but it isn't. The light is always flat and seems like shadows don't matter at all. Colours don't have a meaningful role. There're just a few beautiful shots but most of them aren't. This movie is so lazy.
Photography: 5/10
EDITING
Basic and formulaic. It's by the book but it doesn't try anything new. It's underwhelmingly mediocre.
Editing: 5/10
SPECIAL EFFECTS
Sometimes they work and sometimes they don't, nonetheless they respect the industry standards. Beyond that there isn't anything interesting about them.
Special Effects: 6/10
SOUNDTRACK
It's forgettable and this franchise keeps using the same genre of pop music present in previous installments. It's so obnoxious that the instrumental part of it is just background noise. It's annoying. If it wasn't for Brian Tyler, I would've given a lower vote to this section.
Soundtrack: 5/10
COSTUMES
Nothing interesting about it. The characters wear the same outfit of the previous outings and it seems like they're part of a universe where everyone has only one type of clothes. It's more like a cartoon than a movie. Which is weird. I don't expect much, considering that this is a realistic movie, but there's no trace of originality whatsoever.
Costumes: 5/10
CONCLUSION
Script: 4/10
Acting: 5/10
Photography: 5/10
Editing: 5/10
Special Effects: 6/10
Soundtrack: 5/10
Costumes: 5/10
AVERAGE: 5
Skip this sh!!!t.
Director: Justin Lin
Screenplay: Daniel Casey, Justin Lin
Cast: Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez, Tyrese Gibson, Chris "Ludacris" Bridges, John Cena, Nathalie Emmanuel, Jordana Brewster, Sung Kang, Michael Rooker, Helen Mirren, Kurt Russell, Charlize Theron
Soundtrack: Brian Tyler
Cinematography: Stephen F. Windon
Running Time: 143 minutes
Budget: $212 million
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