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@foxredfilmreviews
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Oh boy...
As a proud 20 year old fan of the Mario series, this film had naturally fascinated me for so long, and after @somegreatflicks gifted me the Blu-Ray for my birthday three months ago, I thought it was finally time to check it out. Super Mario Bros (1993) left me speechless. I was shocked at this abomination. The way it strays so far from the source material is infamous, and while it is of course a major problem with the film, the biggest crime it commits is being so incredibly BORING. Think about it, this is a damn Mario movie. Almost every Mario game in history has been the exact opposite of boring, yet this film takes the colourful imagery, unique character designs, memorable music and creative settings of the games and literally shoves it down the toilet.
The film is both visually and narratively a mess. The pacing is horrible, characters just go from one place to another with no explanation and it even goes for a Back to the Future-style ending in attempting to set up a sequel, which failed on every level. The digital effects have aged well on a technical level but they are used so mindlessly that it just feels like yet another technical showcase for CGI from the early 90s.
Bob Hoskins and John Leguizamo take the roles of Mario and Luigi respectively and their chemistry is the only minor positive of the whole thing. Saying that, this is Mario and Luigi. You could cast Timothee Chalamet and Larry the Cable Guy in these roles and they would still be great together. Dennis Hopper as King Koopa (Bowser for those not in the loop) was disappointing and utterly forgettable, as was every other cast member.
Super Mario Bros was the first ever film adaptation of a video game series, so you could cut it some slack as there was no template to work off, but I will not cut it that slack. This film is a middle finger to all things Mario and that is all it will ever be remembered as. Let's hope Chris Pratt and co. will give us a true big screen depiction of the greatest video game series of all time. Oh boy, Chris Pratt...
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